OMG UPDATE: Question? Answer.

Updated on Wednesday, June 24


QUESTION: I am looking for some advice from fellow UW students, and I can just say this issue has brought me a lot of anxiety.
Being extremely honest, I am very insecure about my sexuality as I can say I am very inexperienced and probably would be considered terrible to hook up with. I have only had sex or done anything past kissing with one person, as I had a boyfriend for the full four years of my undergrad degree (didn't really do anything in high school). Given this, I am really insecure about doing anything more than kissing with a guy, as I really don't have any experience. I recently was seeing a guy and felt really embarrassed as I know sexually, I was quite the disappointment to him, as I really don't know what I'm doing.

I'm just looking for some advice on how to deal with this insecurity and sort of how to get more comfortable or "better" sexually to be with males. I'm okay with the fact that I am pretty terrible sexually haha given the lack of experience I have, but I just feel really uncomfortable being with any guys. At 22, I feel I should be a lot more experienced than I am, and I know that any guy I be with at this point I will be viewed as a big let down (and rightfully so). Any advice for people who are insecure/bad in bed? Thank you to anyone who provides me with some advice!


  1. I'm just one guy but here's my opinion: The sex is always better after a while with the same person. It doesn't matter if you're inexperienced in general, you just have to get to know that one person. So stop getting down on yourself, ask the guy how he likes it, and tell him what you want as well. As time goes on you'll figure each other out and it will be great.

    Also, as a guy, I would bet money that in the cases where you felt you let a guy down the guy thought he let you down too. Guys are very performance-conscious.

  2. Guys don't like experience.

  3. what's there to be nervous about? just act like a randy pornstar and you'll be good to go... what's so hard about sex anyway you stupid prick

  4. What makes you think everyone else is experienced? If it wasn't for bachelor parties I'd have no idea what a real vagina looks like, and I'm 21.

    And to all the people about to say something stupid, I am tall, in very good shape, and pretty decent looking. Relationships haven't worked out for me, yet, and I don't want to just stick it in someone for the sake of doing it.

    1. God help my future best man if there's random stripper vagina at my bachelor party. Also, who let a 20 year old virgin who hasn't see the internet into a bachelor party with strippers?

    2. By 'a real vagina', I mean 'in person' not gazing at a computer screen. I do actually know there's porn on the 'net.