OMG UPDATE: Question? Answer.

Updated on Sunday, April 12

#7111

QUESTION: Post your  fap record  for each day of exams!
Does't matter if your a girl/guy/both (hopefully I didn't trigger anyone).

13 comments

  1. get hit by a bus. hopefully an iXpress

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  2. This is the type of quality post OMGUW needs. On co-op, but 2 today.

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  3. I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding."
    It's basically a joke about Social Justice Warriors on Tumblr (SJWs) and the fact that they are talking about privilege all the time (white privilege, thin privilege, etc.).
    The "I sexually identify as an Attack Helicopter" comes from people, usually those SJWs, identifying themselves, whether sexually or not, as many different things that seem odd. In this case the copypasta makes fun of it by saying the person identifies as an attack helicopter.

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    1. Hopefully you found my explanatian helpfull.

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    2. u fookin wot m8?

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  4. I sexually Identify as a Racecar. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of drifting around corners and running quarter miles in under ten seconds. People say to me that a person being a Racecar is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a shop mechanic install 100-shot of nitrous, adjustable coilovers, and twin scroll turbos on my chassis. From now on I want you guys to call me "Drift King" and respect my right to burn rubber below and shoot flames needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a ricer and need to check your modifying privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

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  5. I don't have any exams this term, only major projects. I've been done for a week with nothing to do and most my friends are busy. I think my record is 6 in one day. I sleep from about midnight-1am until noon-1pm everyday, so that 6 is in a condensed time.

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  6. Are there separate categories for a 24 hour period and back to back? I'm not sure about a 24 hour period but I know I've pulled off (hahahaha!) 3 consecutively. Is their a place near this damn university where one can donate semen? I hate to waste all these good chromosomes.

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  7. What the say did you just say fuck me about, you bitching a little? I'll have you graduate I know top of my Seals in the Navy Classes, and I've been raided in numerou Al Quaeda secret involvements, and I have killed over 300 confirmations. I am a trained gorilla. In warfare, I'm the sniper arm in the entire US force tops. You are targeting me but I'm just another nothing. I will fuck you with precision the wipes which has never been liked before on this scene. Earth, fuck my marking words. You can get away with thinking that shit over me to the Internet? Fuck again, thinker. As we spy I am networking my secret speaking across the trace and your IP is being prepared right now so you better storm the maggots. The wipes that storms out of the little pathetic thing. Life you call yours? Your fucking dead kids. I can be any time. I can weigh you in over seven hundred kills, and that's my bear hands. Not only am I extensively accessed by trains, but I have no arms for combatting the entire arsenal United States, and I will use it to wipe your miserable ass. You shit the faceoff of the continent. If you only could have commented what unholy cleverness your little "retribution" was about. To bring down upon you, maybe you would have fucked your tongue. But you wouldn't, you shouldn't, and now you're holding the pay, you goddamn idiot. I will drown in shit fury. Sincerely, your dead fucking kiddo.

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    Replies
    1. Real though, 3 times the morning before Math 138 just for good vibes.

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    2. *Slow Clap*
      That was the trippiest thing I have read in a while....

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  8. As a level 10 Internet troll, the made me have an orgasm.

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