OMG UPDATE: Question? Answer.

Updated on Tuesday, December 16


QUESTION: A question for the guys: would you constantly hug your friend (girl), cuddle with her and hangout with her more than your other mutual friends if you have no feelings for her? Like is it possible that you do all that just because you two are close and not because you're romatically interested?


  1. Both would be the best answer. If I am romantically interested I might do that sort of stuff, but I also might not because I wouldn't want to risk ruining the friendship if I didn't think you were interested. If I am not romantically interested, and we have a gf/bf closeness of friendship without the romantic part, I would, but if it was just normal close friends, I probably wouldn't do more than normal.

    My signs I am interested in a girl that I am close with:
    - when we walk I walk close to you, sometimes bumping shoulders, and my hand towards you is always empty in case our hands meet and we start holding hands, don't laugh, I started a good relationship this way. It was how we said we liked each other without having to actually say it.
    - If we are cuddling on the couch watching a movie or tv, my arm will be over your shoulder, hand holding your arm or side. (If I am holding your shoulder with my hand, I am not interested, but as a guy, I would probably tap that)
    - If we touch foreheads for any extended amount of time then I want you. If my exgf and I were showing something to the other on our phone or tablet we would be leaning on each other resting on each other's foreheads, noses brushing, ready to go for a kiss once the conversation reached a lull.
    - Arm around waist, hand not on hips means I am just liking the contact, not really romantically interested.
    - If we hug and our hips are pressed firmly together, I would do you right then and there, just find the nearest sturdy surface in a corner. Especially if my hands are linked behind your butt, not necessarily touching your butt, but arms will be resting on top your hip bones.
    - Lower thigh just like the contact, upper thigh/lower inner thigh I am interested

    Probably the biggest giveaway:
    - If we are talking I will always have a small Tom Cruise smile on (think Top Gun at the bar at the start of Top Gun school when he meets Charlie) and I will be looking at your mouth more than normal.

    You can probably tell I am pretty bored right now from how much I wrote.

    1. >If my exgf and I were showing something to the other on our phone or tablet we would be leaning on each other resting on each other's foreheads, noses brushing, ready to go for a kiss once the conversation reached a lull

      This was unintentionally hilarious. How would you even see the screen if your noses are touching?

    2. Looking down past our noses, sort of like how you can see your nose right now, but because of stereo-vision your brain can block it out.

      We would be close only when talking about what was on the screen. While looking we would pull away slightly

    3. First one is 100% on point. Before me and current gf started dating we would always be walking/standing/sitting reeeaallly close together. Like this guy's friends

    4. This was too cute

  2. No, not likely. If you are not interested in more than friendship, (as a guy I plead with you), please do him and yourself the favour of letting him know this! It will be awkward now, but save pain and frustration down the road, unless you like him, in which case let him know if you want to pursue something.

  3. If I did one of those things I'm probably interested let allone all of them

  4. Axe the cuddles and this sounds completely reasonable. But it depends on the relationship; I can't claim my experience applies to everyone.

  5. Fuck no. I wouldn't lead her on like that.

  6. Yeah, if it's already clear between the two of you that it's completely platonic. Got a friend (a girl) who loves to hangout and hug her best friends (and we are all guys) but it's always been clear that that we're not interested in her romantically. and she's not interested in any of us. She loves me and the guys but not in the same way as her boyfriend.

  7. This is the kind of situation where you ask him and then there are no more signs to worry about interpreting.
    If you like him, ask him out. If you don't like him, ask him to have a conversation with you about your relationship (rather than just telling him you want to be platonic; you could also at that point simply ask him if he likes you and go from there).

  8. And this is a situation that could lead to fwb..