OMG UPDATE: Question? Answer.

Updated on Saturday, November 15

#6598

QUESTION: How long does it take to move on from your ex? What do you do? He was my first SO and it's been hard on me.

10 comments

  1. According to Charlotte from Sex and the City, it takes approximately half of the length of your relationship to get over someone.

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    1. I'm in for a long period of recovery if my SO breaks up with me...

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    2. If my SO breaks up with me, it will take 11 years to get over her, and I won't have a hand. Pamela Handerson, I love you

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  2. There are so many variables in play here that it's impossible to give a general answer. Try to keep your mind off him, focus on yourself, and it will happen naturally.

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  3. http://www.ask.omguw.com/2014/11/6549.html

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  4. About 8 months for me.

    Weed helps, as do sluts.

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  5. Just give it time, it'll happen eventually. Go out and keep yourself busy. If you find your mind wandering on about them then think about the bad moments you had together, not the good ones.

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  6. The length of grieving is different for everyone. It's shitty and hard but don't give yourself a deadline to be over that person, let yourself be sad/angry. What has worked best for me was to make my life as awesome as possible after that person - being as engaged as possible in making life rewarding through activities, friendships, work, studies, hobbies etc. I also found I was a lot more creative during periods of deep grief - start writing or painting or music making or whatever you like to do.
    It'll get better OP, be patient. Also, 3 posted a link to some good advice.

    This is an experience almost every adult human has lived through - welcome to the club.

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  7. I agree with 6.
    Also, it's easier to get over someone when you don't see them constantly. Distance yourself, whether it be gradually or suddenly (gradually is easier), doing that by keeping yourself busy with friends, family, hobbies, etc.

    I dated my ex (also my first SO) on and off for 2 years; it took me about 8 months and being at a different university to finally get over him. This is why it is really important to distance yourself, otherwise you'll just cycle in and out of the relationship.

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    1. I would argue that cutting them out cold turkey is much "easier", in a sense. Of course you won't be used to it, and you'll suffer withdrawal, but the chances of relapse decrease significantly with each passing day. It'll be easier on yourself in the long run, as you won't be reminded of them throughout the day.

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