OMG UPDATE: Question? Answer.

Updated on Saturday, October 11

#6448

QUESTION: Are there any groups at UW or in the K-W region for people struggling with shyness or social anxiety? I've heard about them in other cities, I'm just wondering if there was something similar here.

30 comments

  1. I'm really shy, but for the past few years, I've been volunteering at our school's open houses. It really helps! (for just that day; after that, I go back to being my shy self).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Omg, that's exactly what I do. Lol half my wardrobe space has been taken over by different colored volunteer t shirts.

      Delete
  2. I know of one at least. It's called the University of Waterloo.

    ReplyDelete
  3. That seems... counter intuitive

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I understand that. But it would be nice to meet people who you can relate to in terms of shyness.

      Delete
  4. I'm in Toronto for co-op and I actually tried going to a shyess/social anxiety group last week. It wasn't as great as I thought it would be. At first, I thought the meeting was great since I got to hear from a bunch of different people who had the same experiences that I did and I could talk about my anxiety with people who completely understood.

    But at the hang out after the session (everyone usually went to get coffee or dinner afterwards), it got kind of annoying because anxiety was the only thing people would talk about. Most of the people in the group were a lot older too so there wasn't really any opportunity to make similar aged friends.

    It might be nice if someone started a group in UW for students with social anxiety though.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There is a FB page for UW coops in TO

      Delete
  5. I started a club for shy people... but no one shows up

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pics or it didn't happen

      Delete
  6. I guess you have no idea what shyness is. If you were shy, you would never post such an open-minded message. Yes, everything here is anonymous, but people who are really shy, like I am, would never so openly talk about their shyness and would definitely not create a club for it...

    anyways, thumbs up to you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think there are varying degrees. I used to be terrified of asking salespeople for help or making a call of any kind to a stranger. Neither of those things scares me anymore, although I'm still pretty flustered when I meet someone new.

      Delete
    2. (OP)-6-I get what you mean. But I do understand what shyness is. I've been shy for most of my life. I think 6a is right, that it varies for different people. For me, I have a huge problem with meeting people and socializing. I wanted to see if there were any groups in the area that would help with that, with people who understand how truly difficult it can be to meet and socialize when you're shy.

      I'm realizing that a group like this might not exist here, so it might be easier to work on my shyness by joining a club that interests me. We'll see how that goes.

      Delete
    3. if you were really shy you wouldn't have commented

      LOL your logic makes no sense

      Delete
    4. My posts make a lot of sense, their logic is just complicated and I'm bad at explaining.

      Delete
    5. As another shy person, I think OP's posts make sense. But like 6a said, there are varying degrees of shyness so OP's level of shyness might not make sense to everyone.

      Delete
  7. I think the best approach to deal with social anxiety is to forget about your social issues and focus on yourself, and maybe on your grades?
    Be independent, maintain high grades, volunteer or join clubs to get a decent academic record.

    Then, there will be no reason to be anxious unless you look/sound very silly.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I would like to respectfully disagree with 7. Ignoring the problem doesnt fix it. Being shy isnt about not knowing your shit, its about a fear of judgment -i.e. a fear of people thinking you dont know your shit.

    I started uni EXTREMELY shy, and honestly what helped me is a whole BUNCH of volunteering (people are ridiculously friendly!) And a job in retail, its hard at first but hey, so is everything in life!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree with your first paragraph.

      I wondering how you're able to volunteer though... (I'm assuming you're talking about school open houses?) I feel like people sign up with groups of friends to volunteer at those things. I'm really terrible at making conversation among groups of established friends so it seems to me that volunteering at an open house would be a nightmare.

      Delete
    2. ^ I'm* wondering

      Delete
    3. volunteer at hospitals or senior care centers, that's what I did back when I was sixteen, my supervisor was very nice to me :)

      Delete
    4. 8a, I volunteer for events by myself since my friends are not into that type of stuff. Yes, I end up just smiling or blending into the background when all other volunteers are neatly bonded into groups of friends volunteering together and don't spare me a second look. I however try and talk to the person running a shift with me or something.

      Delete
  9. For me, off-campus volunteering did the trick! Basically most of the people didnt know each other and so you start with a blank slate. ALSO you get to practice talking to people of all kinds of backgrounds and ages (not just uni students)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Most people who think they are shy are really just introverts and pressured by our amazing society to not be themselves because extrovert = successful. Just accept yourself for who you are, with your strengths and weaknesses and life will take care of the rest.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Can you please shut up? This is the exact same thing as people writing off mental illnesses. "Depression isn't real, you just need to do things that make you happy!"

      You're not motivational, just ignorant.

      Delete
    2. How on earth can you become successful if the moment you step out of your room, you start hyperventilating, shaking, your mind becomes unclear and your iq drops by 50%?

      Delete
  11. THANK YOU @10A! While its okay for people to be introverted, when it starts getting in the way of life (i.e. avoiding social events, asking for help etc...) it becomes a problem you need to work on.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 1 here (really shy person).

      Just curious, is "avoiding social events" really considered "getting in the way of life"? I mean, the way I see it is that social events aren't really mandatory I guess? They're sort of how you can spend your free time. If I'd rather spend my free time working on a personal project, playing video games, or practicing music, shouldn't that be fine? I mean, is choosing one over the other really considered getting in the way of life?

      I'm not trying to sound rude or anything, I'm actually genuinely curious here.

      Delete
    2. @11a: It's fine if you'd rather do your own thing. If you know you're happier playing a game or working on your own project, that's cool.

      The problem occurs when people want to go to these events, but anxiety due to their shyness is stopping them. I used to be this way. I'd want to go to fun things and meet people, but on the rare occasion that I went, I usually hid in a corner - even though that was detrimental to my goal of going in the first place.

      I'm not sure what you define as "shy", but you sound perfectly normal - you just prefer to be alone sometimes.

      Delete