OMG UPDATE: Question? Answer.

Updated on Friday, July 18

#6061

QUESTION: Why do some couples fight so much? In my building, at least twice a week, I see/hear couples screaming/swearing/pushing one another. I have honestly never witnessed anyone getting as angry as some of these people. I mean, I've been in long-term relationships myself, I've never yelled swore at or pushed my SO out of anger. Why do people do this? Why do people in relationships tolerate this? Is it wrong of me to intervene if I see a guy/girl hitting their partner? I've been in Waterloo for 3 years and have never seen this as prominently as I have this term and honestly, it really pisses me off to see people treating others (especially someone they probably CHOSE to be in a relationship with) so disrespectfully.

5 comments

  1. Just possibly, this term is just incredibly horrible. Everything is abnormal. Especially the weather.

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  2. Some people just don't know how to have an argument. If they're both screaming at each other, I'd assume they're both just immature and there's no way I'm involving myself in that. If one partner is verbally abusing the other to the point it seems threatening and serious, that's when I'd be thinking about stepping in or calling for help.

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    1. +1

      It's immaturity. They probably don't care enough about making themselves better people, let alone allowing that to pass on to their relationship.

      Sometimes people just don't try hard enough to make things work.

      And sometimes people are just ass holes.

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  3. I'd be lying if I said I haven't ever yelled or sworn at my boyfriend in a big argument. Sometimes in order to deal with big problems in a relationship, people act in a way that they aren't proud of. However, I do feel that once the initial anger has worn off (usually after about 10 minutes of nastiness), the problem gets solved through solid communication and compromise, and is no longer an issue down the road. I wouldn't do this in public though - there's no need to air out your dirty laundry in the middle of campus.

    In addition to what I've said, hitting your partner is never an option. Yelling and swearing is a far more healthy way of getting out frustration, even if someone you love is taking the brunt of it. If you apologise for yelling and swearing and you aren't being abusive, I don't see why that is disrespectful - it's just human nature to have explosive emotions sometimes, especially with someone you are so close to.

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    Replies
    1. One reason I always try to breathe properly before I speak, and manage my stress by doing stuff (like twirling my beard or rubbing hands), is to avoid saying/doing something I will later regret.

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