OMG UPDATE: Question? Answer.

Updated on Tuesday, April 22

#6369

QUESTION:
I think I may be assexual, since I have no sexual desire for males or females ( vaginas and penises scare me), but I do masterbate and find males attractive but not enough to do them? Anyone else assexual on campus, and if so how did you know you were? Btw I'm female.

17 comments

  1. Not really that helpful but I identified as asexual for a while. In retrospect it was more of a mix between a deep seated phobia of sexual contact and a lack of preference in gender. I don't mean to suggest that asexual is not a legitimate sexuality, it totally is, or that asexuality is some sort of cover up for other problems but I mention my own story as your post states "vaginas and penises scare me". I hope regardless of how you identify, eventually your fear of penises and vaginas dissipates.

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  2. ASS SEXUAL hahahahaha

    kind of ironic since this is about asexuality

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    1. hahahahaha no. loser.

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    2. @2a, excellent reply to a ridiculous answer. +1

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  3. I would say you shouldn't identify with anything. Identity is just a game and illusion anyway. How about you do what you truly think is right for you.

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    1. It's true. A baseless illusion. Smoke and mirrors. No substance there at all.

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    2. Whether you identify as something is a personal choice. For some it helps to reassure. To others, it might feel like they are stuck in a box. To each their own!

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    3. ^ Of course to each their own. If that's what you want, have at it. I am just saying that having an identity is an illusion; doesn't mean it's a bad or good thing.. it's just how it is. We seem to all be destined to wake up out of it though..

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  4. This may not be helpful, because 'm not asexual, but I think penises and vaginas are gross. Like they are so dirty and smelly. I think everyone feels that way a bit. You kind of just have to get over that part. Just thought you should know non asexuals can relate to that.

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  5. Not asexual, but incapable of forming emotional bonds here. Sucks.

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  6. Form an emotional bond with someone first. Wait for you guys to get close. Real close. If you're still not feeling anything, then maybe you're asexual. Otherwise, you're just developing. And that's fine.

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    1. Agreed, it sounds like you're just not comfortable with sexuality in general. Don't worry about and don't push yourself. If something comes along don't fight it and take it slow.

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  7. you are not a sexual. maybe bi sexual. masturbating you self is still worse than having others touch you or stick ther shit in your shit

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  8. Exact same situation here! Good to know there are others out there!

    I knew that I was because everyone I know had had sex or boyfriends/girlfriends and I couldn't care less. It's like if everyone loves chocolate and you don't care for it. I just have zero interest- I don't understand the fuss! That said, asexual people can still have fulfilling relationships with others (including sex). As with people of any sexual orientation, it is all about establishing boundaries that you are comfortable with.

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    1. eh, I don't think you really know if you are until you're in a situation where its right there and you still don't want it. Having low sex drive isn't the same as being a-sexual. Neither is "not getting the fuss".

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  9. 8 here- I would disagree. For instance, someone can identify as gay without having had sex. Though some might find sex an indicator of what they prefer/don't prefer, it isn't always necessary.

    You're right- a low sex drive is different than asexuality. This was not, however, what I was arguing. Asexuals can have sex drives (though not always). Asexuality is a lack of sexual orientation, not lack of sex drive. I would suggest this link for further information: http://www.asexuality.org/home/

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    1. Sorry- this was in response to 8A :)

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